Our mindsets change in life - or at least they probably should. When that happens we tend to build relationships with people that are of a like mind with us. That doesn't mean that we just throw all other relationships away, it also doesn't mean that we will become best friends with all those people. Some of those relationships will carry us through a tough time and then wither, others will continue to grow. I have seen this played out in our lives so much during the last five years of this missionary journey.
Fresh in my mind, of course, are the relationships that we recently made with other families and care givers while Mom was in hospice. Will those last? It is too soon to tell, but I can already see that God had a plan in building those relationships even if only for a short time.
Another type of like mindedness was brought to the forefront of my brain tonight. It is sort of a missionary mind. Not like some holier than though thing - because believe you me, missionaries are no holier than other people. The missionary mind of been there, done that, got the T-shirt, and hey I can actually understand you.
I imagine it is much like how people of one culture tend to bond with others of that culture when they are put in a new situation. Sort of like how when there was a larger Indonesian population at our church, they tended to hang out a lot together. It's not that people of that culture don't want anything to do with the rest of the world, they just have shared experiences that others do not. It creates a link and a bond faster than it otherwise might.
Here is why I was thinking about that. We have spent four years overseas and had a hard time keeping in touch with people back here in the States. We never seemed to be able to connect via Skype as often as we would have liked. Though we did a decent job staying in touch with grandparents, the rest of the world sort of passed us by and vice versa.
We are, like many others, people who invest in the relationships that are right in front of us on a daily basis. That's no so bad, unless one of your children really needs a friend...a particular friend... a friend who can only be accessed via the amazing blessing of the internet. That was our story earlier tonight. Praise God the needed friend has parents who understand that exact thing. We sent an email requesting a skype date soon and got the response of "how about right now?" An evening of tears turned into a night of laughter, because another parent understood exactly what we and our kids were going through - because they had been there and on this thing we were of a like mind.
Also tonight we were reminded of the blessing of having someone around who has gone through something you are, and will be going through. When we were preparing to leave for Guatemala we became close to a family who were on furlough. To us they were some of the only people, if not the only ones, who could understand what we were going through preparing to leave this life behind. They were people who knew what it was like to visit churches, speak at dessert nights, pray that another person would sink their teeth into your ministry through financial and prayer support. They had been there. That was such a blessing to us!
It is a blessing for us, right now, to be that support to friends of ours who are preparing to leave for the foreign mission field. Little did we know that after four years we would be on a furlough and they would be preparing to leave. It is so great to be able to confidently, or maybe semi-confidently, answer questions they have and give advice about things to look out for. I am so thankful that we are being able to do that for another couple as someone once did for us.
So I encourage you - in whatever you are going through know that you are not alone. Somewhere out there is someone who has been there, or is there right now. There is someone else that you can talk to to help sort out your issues. Don't leave all your other friends behind, and don't get mad at them because they can't understand, go and find the ones who can and add them into your circle. You may not build a relationship that lasts a lifetime, but then again maybe that is just what God has in store for you.
